What do you think about love? Important and Irrational or Not-so-important and rational?

I am most definitely not the right person to talk about love in the truest sense of it, the kinds they talk about in books -  considering I've always been in 'walk-in-walk-out' relationships (romantically) and I value my platonic relationships wee bit too much to be able to write about them.

 

But given the fact that most of the world lives in a practical world of love where one's choice of lover is based on a complex matrix of compatibility, or in more crude terms - convenience. Career and family compatibility, value-system compatibility, status compatibility, tolerance-compatibility, sense of settlement compatibility and a whole bunch of such factors. I very well understand (and respect the fact)  that these factors vary in importance for different people but the crux remains the same - it  is the long term compatibility based on ones limits and limitations.

 

I am a staunch believer of this matrix. Only because I have one life and I want to spend it living completely rather than loving mindlessly. As long as I can peacefully co-exist with certain constants like respect and space, I think the love et al falls into place. I've never heard of real Romeo-Juliet /Laila-Majnu/Heer-Ranjha couples. Honestly,  the real-life couples with most dramatic and awww(e)-inspiring stories are based on the (not-so-simple) compatibility/comfort level matrix! So why bother much?

 

Anyway why did I go explaining this? Because each time I read a book that describes love in a very heroic way, it leaves me bewildered. When passages talk about love with such passion, I am left wondering what it must be like to be in such love. (Disclaimer: I don't want to be in such destructive love where lovers can kill or die or go mad or disown or forget-it-all. I am happy feeling jitters and butterflies every now and then choosing to walk in if it is nice and walk out if it was too much hassle for the 2 of us!)

 

I've always written down those passages (among other beautiful passages) from books into my little red-colored spiral note-book --- to use it as a text for reference. I've been an utter failure in understanding/imbibing those feelings but I have taken the pain to type them out and put them up in my new blog, here. 

That is because they sound amazing and make for some literary delight. Some of these stories are brave, some docile, some plain-romantic, some meaningless - but they are just beautiful pieces of text. In fact some of them are close to real feelings too! (I am not a die-hard romantic but girl-enough to feel special things!)

 

If any of you can relate to the passages out there, do leave a comment! Hope you enjoy reading them as much as I did!

 

(Clearly, my own answer to the question in the title is - important and rational)

 

Buzzzz....

Ladakh calling - in July. Yes Myulee, we will go. My family has a thing against me being adventurous. Irrespective of the fact that they've been there done that and have always come out of adventures, being happy and fine! Never mind, I've done far too many things in life because I wanted to do them, not getting deterred by their 'we'll save you from everything forever.' Ladakh is just drop in the ocean.

 

Cousins coming over. Preparing myself for the quintessential family debate - with me on one side trying to explain I will do what I want to do as and when I want to do it - and with family on the other side trying to convince me that life is a battle against time - and so I should make the most of today. (And the topic will eventually shift to - 'make the most' in whose terms? Theirs or mine? And I will be told I am faffing around to compensate for the lack of focus and direction in life.) Damn, even the thought tires me out. Wonder how I will go through the drill. Sigh!

 

Twinnie will be missed. My vent when deepest fears are turning ugly, my motivation machine when I need to hear - "Girl, I am telling you - when this plastic bubble breaks - you are gonna have it all. It is just a matter of time before you had the dream college and that one person who loves you for who you are." And I will miss the instant second line - "Look at everyone man! They are all set! And you and me will be forever sitting at Hard Rock café sipping sweet lime and smoking cigarettes." hahah. Yes girl, I will miss you.

 

And what is already missed is someone with wolf-like capacity to read, clarity of thoughts (or maybe the lack of it) and certain special moments. But happiness is transitionary and has to be cherished for its worth - not to be looked back at bring the sulking out. So I am at peace with what I had and what I don't have. 

IPL 2009

We are 3 people who live in this house. And when the 3 people are cricket fanatics supporting 3 different teams in a breathtaking tournament, the tension is inevitable.

 

After 6 straight victories, little did Mr. Brother-in-law know that supporting Bangalore Royal Challengers would only break his heart. Pseudo-fan that Ms Sister is, she was quite clear she wanted her ever favorite Sehwag's team to be picking up the trophy, but alas. And me, I had the gumption to support the worst team last year - Deccan Chargers. 'GO CHARGERS!!!' has been my mantra in the last 60 odd days.

 

I wonder if it was mockery or support, but Mr bro-in-law bought me a Deccan Chargers Pin-up badge that I would wear for every single match. Today was special. With sister's team having to bite the dust in the semis, it was a battle of nerves for me and Mr Bro-in-law. And how my team emerged from the ashes to be a proud, jubilant team - is just history.

 

Considering how I fall for things like intellect and talent, there was no doubt I was developing a soft corner for a few players in my team. Little did I know that this soft corner will turn into almost obsessive  love for both of them. I write this post, feeling terrible - because my heart is resting with 2 people instead of 1 - and my conscience is battling with me. I have decided that whoever plays a better game in T20 World Cup, gets a definitive place. Until then, I have to live with the guilt of loving Rohit Sharma and RP Singh in scarily equal measures.

 

As I sleep tonight with the badge pinned very close to my heart, I will think of Andrew Symonds - THE man, Adam Gilchrist - THE leader, Rohit Sharma - whose presence on the field gave me goose bumps and last (and sure as hell not the least)  RP Singh - whose calm yet broad and clear smiles are probably the most potent thing in the world. 

Of a book and a crazy nook - the new blog.

So the new blog is here! This is by far the most meaningful thing I have done, at least on webspace and I hope people take a lot of interest in it. 

Again, as mentioned in my last post, if you read something interesting and think people at large can benefit from it, please send it across to me (via email/comments anything) and I shall post it on the blog. 

I hope you enjoy reading this new blog it just as much as I enjoy writing it! 

“The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who can't read.” - Mark Twain.

I read a lot. At least I try to. There are times when I read for 19hrs a day and there are times when I read only 19 pages a day. But I read something everyday. I always believe that if a book has something for you to learn from it, you will pick up that book at the right time and read it. If you havent read a particular book yet, it is because it has something for you to learn at a latter date. Some people say I think so because I relate whatever I am reading to, with my current situation and pick something from it. Either way, I see reading as a cathartic process. 

And when I read, if there is something that touches me somewhere, irrespective of whether I understand the author's intention completely or not, I write it down in a diary that I have for the last many years. I quote the author, note down the name of the book and the page number. My diary now has some timeless jewels. I've always held that diary very closely to myself and have gone back and re-read the pages, to see if I understand the same thing better or even for that matter, differently. I always thought I will give that diary to someone deserving - whoever it be - a stranger, my grandchildren, my mother - whoever. 

I read something nice today and when I took the book out to write it down I felt like a miser trying to treasure what I have. But is knowledge to be treasured in books or is to be precipitated for a higher goal? Most definitely the latter. And so I though what better than a new blog which has only that. Just precious words quote unquote. It might give some people some much needed inspiration, it might make people pick up a book they have been procrastinating to read or even introduce people to something new. People can leave comments on their interpretation of the words, express agreement/disagreement or plainly find a beautiful expression for what's been there on their mind. 

Let me know what you think of this. Meanwhile I will look for a nice template, a good title for the blog and choose my first passage. (GMAT can wait! ) 

Breakin' the habit.

We went to Mysore yesterday. With my uncle, aunt, and 2 little cousins. We visited a few temples en route and I experienced a divine moment. We reached this really old temple at about 1:15 in the afternoon just while they were shutting the door. It was a typical huge wooden door that take 5 people to push it to shut. We ran and just made our way in. It was almost as if God wanted us to visit and so we made it. The moment has stayed with me - running the last 20 meters to make it inside. It was so figurative and metaphorical of my present state of mind and life. I can relate the shutting door and running me to so many things. 

There was also something else I learnt yesterday. Enjoying whatever is there is so important. I have grown up to be a typical 20 something who has very rigid ways of enjoyment and vacation. At other times, I would only enjoy a vacation when 

a. it was not too tightly scheduled. 

b. It did not include kids. 

c. It was to an exotic location (mountains, water body, forests, calm and quiet etc.) 

d. I had my iPod and my music to go with it. 

e. I had my bandana to make sure my hair was not all over my face. 

And a whole lot of other things. 

Yesterday was none of those. There were 2 kids with us - 1 a cranky 10 yr old and another exceptionally quiet teenager with her typical teenage whims (I wont walk, I wont eat this, wont do this, that etc.) I did not have my bandana and I could not plug my iPod since it would have been rude. We were subjected to Udit Narayan's telugu songs and when we insisted on Hindi music we had to listen to tracks of 'Partner' on repeat. But I still enjoyed myself. I was happy chit chatting with my aunt about random family members, letting my hair go haywire with the wind and the ocassional rain that made things worse in a cramped up car. I did not mind untying my shoe laces a zillion times at different temples. And I did not mind eating some stupid food for lunch. 

I did not crib at Mysore palace considering I HATE crowded places (minus pubs) with a vengeance. I did not mind not being able to buy mineral water due to lack of availability. We also went to Vrindavan Gardens (the most screwed up tourist destination ever. My uncle went and gave a piece of his mind to the authorities there for the sheer mismanagement and for the lack of anything interesting to see!) and I can safely say I lived through the terrible experience with grace and was in fact able to control my teenage cousin from losing it out there. 

As we got home it was well past mid night and I was not irritated to open the lock to the house by myself (I don't like coming home to an empty house.) I wanted to wear some shorts or such other meagre clothes but then again I could not. (Yeah, some jazz about refraining from such clothes when there are elders at home.) And guess what! I did not mind wearing a round neck tee which was almost strangulating me! I had to sleep on the floor since all the beds were occupied. My body was hurting with the long hours of travel. But I still slept peacefully. I was still not irritated! 

 I don't like waking up surrounded by people (1 or 2 - fine. Not 8.) When I woke up this morning I saw 4 pairs of feet around me. 4 people were trying to find something in a bag. Typical me would be shooing people away since I want to be left alone and since I would not want to wake up with such random sounds. But I was ok. I quietly went (and luckily the bathroom was not occupied so I could brush my teeth.) and freshened up. 

Finally I am alone in my room (rest of the clan has again ventured somewhere out) and I am feeling contented since I finally managed breaking out of the rigid mould of what an ideal vacation, an ideal good night's sleep and an ideal morning should be like. 

After all what is ideal? 

I need an answer.

Was it in fact a good idea at all that we chased the Brits out of our country? 

Think about it and tell me.