Escape is easier than change. So I love vacations!

Why is it always so difficult to articulate beauty?

After about a month of dilly-dally the trip finally happened. I went to Goa with the girls. Probably my best ever vacation. Ok I might sound thankless for all the other wonderful vacations I've had but this was hands down the best time I've ever had! Colva, Majorda, Calangute (yuck!) Bagha, Candolim, Anjuna, Dona Paula, Panjim, Old Goa (ok not an architecture fan), Alcohol, dancing, driving, drunk driving, cops, bike breakdown, water sports, borrowing clothes, footwear, accessories from each other, getting pissed off and bursting into fits of laughter, sitting quietly for hours and contemplating about nothing and everything - it was all there in the last 4 days.

We spent hours at the beach, sitting on those long foot-ons, thinking to ourselves some hot guy will zoom towards us in a water-scooter. But as all of us know, life is not that kind. Forget water scooter, we did not even see cute guys at Totos or Brittos! And the ones who looked cute, if I showed you those boys you'd call me a pedophile. Yes we've all suddenly grown old. I couldn't even drink for the first half of the trip and I almost told myself this is the last time I am going to Goa - after all you can't sip pots of ginger tea at Goa, can you?

We drove hundreds of kilometers in the state, got a crazy tan, drank loads of coconut water, alcohol and tea. We slept until late during the day and stayed awake through the night. What was so different from your regular vacation? Well nothing. Then what makes it so special? Just the thought that it could probably be one of my last vacations with the girls for a long long time to come.

The same feeling again, that I get each time I am having a good time - life is so easy around people you know and you love. There is no pretence, there is no pleasing. They don’t care how terrible you look in those night clothes and yet make fun of you when you are dressed at your best. You don’t miss anyone, there is no wanting to make calls or worrying about  what the future might hold or how bad that last year was. Time comes to a stand still and yet moves so fast. There is no earlier in the day and no later in the evening. All that's there is that moment and the feeling of utmost satisfaction with what you have.

And then there is the power of the supreme. Standing alone in front of the roaring sea at 2 am makes you feel so small, so petty. Driving alone on a dark street tells you the darkness is for a reason, for a reality check. No matter how powerful man gets, some things will continue to dictate their supremacy. The sea can give you the same feeling that those mountains can give. They are harmless at that instant but can get nasty. You don't want to provoke the beautiful waves in the ocean, the darkness of the night, the silence of the mountains and the evenness of the deserts.

Vacations are getting better. Hopefully life will get better too. The hot sun is sometimes more comforting than the cool moonlight. As of now, I am back to this shithole of a place called office and to bustling Bombay. It helps to know that there are enough bounties of nature to leave behind your mundane life at and to feel alive for a few hours every year, in the name of vacation.

P.S: Do not spend on high SPF sunscreens.

Pink and Purple weekend.

So it was a great weekend. I went to Hyd for an interview at a world-class B-School. I did a mediocre or even a sub-standard job of convincing the panel as to why they should take me. I couldn't articulate my thoughts well. My answers did not convince me, let alone convince someone else!

But for a change it was not something that bothered me. I did not come out with a heavy heart or a sinking feeling, which I otherwise do when things don't go my way. I loved the sight of a campus and I knew I want to be there on some campus - this or some other. I felt small in front of the interview panel, which again was a great feeling. When you are surrounded by people who think you are doing great for yourself, it is important to have someone criticize you and wake you up from your fairytale dream . I felt I have a long way to go and at the same time I felt convinced that I was doing the right thing.

There was of course more to the weekend than that. There was the best time ever spent with Cams. There was watching of 8 movies, head massage, making omelets for breakfast and dal rice curry for lunch. There was going out at midnight for ice cream. There was feeling sick and getting pampered. He stood at the interviewee lobby at the campus, like a body guard, in t-shirt and denims without for once feeling awkward around all the immaculately dressed candidates. He was way more nervous than I was! He spoke to me about certain life-changing decisions of my life and gave me some perspective.

I felt I never left Hyd and he never got married. All the credit goes to him for treasuring me and loving me a little more every passing day. I haven't had a 'Thank God I have him/her' feeling in so long! I left in the morning with mixed feelings - so happy that I have him and so sad that our little vacation was over.

And as always, I know that one good time comes to an end only to make way to another.

Lost now and lost forever.

PP asked me to write something, anything - as a reply to my last post. And considering she is one of my favorite people in blogosphere, an obedient friend, a nice and clean soul, a listener when I need to talk, shares my crazy dreams and above all laughs on my silly jokes - I would honor her request. This post is from my diary. Just a copy-paste from MS OneNote to Blogger. I wrote it in January on my way to Delhi from Bhopal to attend a friend's wedding.

I'm travelling alone after what seems like eternity. An A/C Chair car - a 7 hour journey in a 5-star coach. Feels like my 12 hour flight to London. What mixed feelings they were... Excited for the destination but the journey was spent creating boring PPTs in a claustrophobic BA flight...sigh!

I have a window seat and as I sat I sighed a loud sigh of relief... the kinds they show in movies - a distressed corporate woman finally on her 3 day annual vacation. I looked out of the huge windows as the train moved out of Bhopal into beautiful yellow mustard fields. After 5 mins I realized I was drifting into not so pleasant thoughts of my recent past. I told myself - "Remember what your boss told you today? You've earned this holiday. So stop thinking of stupid things and enjoy this. Can't you see it is so pretty?"

As always I started drawing analogies. The fields outside were so beautiful but they were beautiful from a distance. Just seeing those farmers toil in the hot sun (which added to the beauty of the fields) was so distressing. I then thought there are so many bittersweet things in life which are like that - we wanna be there, have that. For example be rich with all the money which comes with all the hours, days and years of hard work or being in love which we all want to but only know how difficult it is once we are in it.

But that's the deal - Does it keep us happy in the long run to be shut in the suffocating comfort of a 2X3 Airconditioned coach and look out of the window like we were jailed or do we want to toil it and make those beautiful yellow fields ourselves....?

And I jerked back to reality when I was offered some piping hot coffee. I went to the loo and experienced that dreadful sucction/vaccuum flush again. There is nothing I hate as much as the noise they make. That's a big reason why I hate long distance flights. Those sounds.. damn!

I came back to my seat and decided to sleep for that's the only way to rejuvenate after 3 professionally and personally difficult months.

And sleep cheated me this time.

...and I am back (for a little while though!)

I know I know Ive been off for too long! I've been busy vacationing, pampering little kids and getting pampered by elders. What a good life, aah!

I don't have too much to write except that I went to Kerala on vacation and was in awe of the place! The greenery is just mind blowing. I also realized, for the Nth time, that I am a city girl - out and out. Each time I am visiting an exotic location my head and heart tell me I can live there in peace and solitude forever but in exactly 3 days I start missing the bustling traffic and lousy malls where there is either too much or nothing to buy! :D

I also went to our Holy place, Tirupati - after 23 years and I think the God must have been some dude to have such crazy fan following! We had a VIP entry to the place so it took us only 45 mins to get to the Sanctum Sanctorum but for people who had come there for 'Sarva Darshan' had to stand in that claustrophobic queue for 10 hours just to catch a glimpse of the God. I can tell you that some training in Bombay locals will help you stand there for anywhere between 2 to 5 seconds to get a view of the idol, otherwise you will come out after suffering blows and pushes from all directions - and feeling abysmally low cause you couldn't see/feel/experience any divinity.

As predicted, my extended family has been casting doubts about my ambitions - and have been asking me to be more realistic. But my parents are by me for whatever I do, so that is all that matters! My brother's younger boy is ADORABLE! He is the naughtiest thing I have ever seen but he is just tooo cute!

India lost the match last night... sigh! RP Singh and Rohit Sharma can find someone else for themselves. I don't love them anymore. :|

I realized that the friends I used to speak 3 times a day to, I now only speak to them once in 3 weeks - no prizes for guessing, they are all married. Hmph! But I really couldn't care less. (Damn, did I just lie?)

I am job hunting and hoping I find one before my rapidly depleting bank account touches the big zero.

I have 2 weeks to go for a make-or-break exam and I have been royally chillin' for the last 2 weeks which means I'll be seen less often on blogosphere. I must now get back to books and must spend my spare time looking for work :|

So am off for now and I will keep reading blogs and commenting, though I dont think I will write much myself. See u later peeps!

Breakin' the habit.

We went to Mysore yesterday. With my uncle, aunt, and 2 little cousins. We visited a few temples en route and I experienced a divine moment. We reached this really old temple at about 1:15 in the afternoon just while they were shutting the door. It was a typical huge wooden door that take 5 people to push it to shut. We ran and just made our way in. It was almost as if God wanted us to visit and so we made it. The moment has stayed with me - running the last 20 meters to make it inside. It was so figurative and metaphorical of my present state of mind and life. I can relate the shutting door and running me to so many things. 

There was also something else I learnt yesterday. Enjoying whatever is there is so important. I have grown up to be a typical 20 something who has very rigid ways of enjoyment and vacation. At other times, I would only enjoy a vacation when 

a. it was not too tightly scheduled. 

b. It did not include kids. 

c. It was to an exotic location (mountains, water body, forests, calm and quiet etc.) 

d. I had my iPod and my music to go with it. 

e. I had my bandana to make sure my hair was not all over my face. 

And a whole lot of other things. 

Yesterday was none of those. There were 2 kids with us - 1 a cranky 10 yr old and another exceptionally quiet teenager with her typical teenage whims (I wont walk, I wont eat this, wont do this, that etc.) I did not have my bandana and I could not plug my iPod since it would have been rude. We were subjected to Udit Narayan's telugu songs and when we insisted on Hindi music we had to listen to tracks of 'Partner' on repeat. But I still enjoyed myself. I was happy chit chatting with my aunt about random family members, letting my hair go haywire with the wind and the ocassional rain that made things worse in a cramped up car. I did not mind untying my shoe laces a zillion times at different temples. And I did not mind eating some stupid food for lunch. 

I did not crib at Mysore palace considering I HATE crowded places (minus pubs) with a vengeance. I did not mind not being able to buy mineral water due to lack of availability. We also went to Vrindavan Gardens (the most screwed up tourist destination ever. My uncle went and gave a piece of his mind to the authorities there for the sheer mismanagement and for the lack of anything interesting to see!) and I can safely say I lived through the terrible experience with grace and was in fact able to control my teenage cousin from losing it out there. 

As we got home it was well past mid night and I was not irritated to open the lock to the house by myself (I don't like coming home to an empty house.) I wanted to wear some shorts or such other meagre clothes but then again I could not. (Yeah, some jazz about refraining from such clothes when there are elders at home.) And guess what! I did not mind wearing a round neck tee which was almost strangulating me! I had to sleep on the floor since all the beds were occupied. My body was hurting with the long hours of travel. But I still slept peacefully. I was still not irritated! 

 I don't like waking up surrounded by people (1 or 2 - fine. Not 8.) When I woke up this morning I saw 4 pairs of feet around me. 4 people were trying to find something in a bag. Typical me would be shooing people away since I want to be left alone and since I would not want to wake up with such random sounds. But I was ok. I quietly went (and luckily the bathroom was not occupied so I could brush my teeth.) and freshened up. 

Finally I am alone in my room (rest of the clan has again ventured somewhere out) and I am feeling contented since I finally managed breaking out of the rigid mould of what an ideal vacation, an ideal good night's sleep and an ideal morning should be like. 

After all what is ideal? 

The 8 week break in the 8th city for those 8 months after those 8 years.

Alright Mike! It’s time for some change! Parents will probably shift base from North India to South India - roots calling it seems! Which means I will also shift base - but not to where ma-pa will go. I am off to another city - a city where almost all my love(ed ones/rs hehehe) live! And guess what? I am not allowed to tell anybody that I am in that city!

 

According to my parents, this is supposedly a break where I concentrate only and only on my exams and catch up on some reading and exercising. They think 8 months is too long to stay with parents after 8 years of staying alone - and they are freakin right! So this is an 8-week paid break to do my thing in a lavish 4 bedroom apartment with everything being taken care of! So what If I wont have company, never mind I can indulge into some ones-rampant vices of my life and get a kick ;-)

 

So I am damn glad I have parents who understand and know me so well. It is hard to be in 'that' city and not tell anyone. :( But what the hell, it's only 8 weeks and neither me or them are dying without each other. This is my last chance to redemption. And I owe my parents (and myself) some real ass-kickin' scores and a feckin' awesome admit. And to hell with everything else.

 

Though I am really concerned if my Telugu-turned-Hindi parents will ever manage being Hindi-turned-Telugus!

 

And in case I din't say it before, this will be the 8th town I'd be moving to in my life! So many 8s... hmmm… an 800 score on GMAT is next, may be? :D

 

 

The exquisite tragedy - My Best Friend's wedding.

Yes, I really never thought Poona would be about 4 busy working women who are my best friends and who would go out of their way to spend that extra hour with me and take time out for me, no matter what. Never thought Poona would be about fancy dinners and expensive clothes. Never thought Poona would also be about my best friend's wedding.

I was at Pune from 10th of Feb until the 13th. I was there for Piyu's wedding. Piyu's wedding was the most awaited event in the life of me and Shilpa (and of course in the life of Piyu and Chetan!)

We had a spinster party for Piyu. No there were no male strippers brought in with the bride in a limousine at Vegas over alcohol over flowing all over the place and with 50 of the bride's chic friends. The party had 3 people - The bride, Shilpa and me.

It had 2 phases. The first one started at about 10 AM and got over by 12 in the noon. There was some crazy clicking of pictures, checking out the bride's (much discussed) nightwear and li*ger*e (wink wink Piyu!) and of course - 'Piyu, brush kar! Mujhe bhook lagi hai!!!' The party had Poha, chai and vada-pav to eat, all consumed at the Joshi vade vale counter in BMCC lane.

Phase 2 was the night before the wedding - 3 of us pretending to be asleep in 3 beds in the same room at the venue of the wedding. Then there was some discussion about how we wish the wedding wasn't the next day and we could talk all night long without the fear of dark circles and swollen eyes for the bride.

The wedding started late the next day. It was a beautiful Maharashtrian wedding - simple and pure. There was a small girl, aged about 10 who sang Shubha Mangala Savadhan in the best way I've ever heard. The garlands were exchanged, the couple blessed and a tear rolled down Piyu's cheek - and that's when I decided I couldn't and wouldn't stay for the Bidaai (yes, the official send-off of the bride.) Yes, I was selfish. But seeing Piyu go was like giving my favouritest possession to someone - for no apparent reason.

I also felt the contrast between a guy's wedding and a girl's wedding. Cams's wedding was fun - he was bringing in someone new. But Piyu was going away. (In reality, Cams is gone to another girl whereas Piyu will be back to us right after her honeymoon!) We finished lunch and I almost instructed Chetan to love Piyu as much as we do, since anyway no one can love her more than us!

On my way back to Mayu's apartment, Poona had changed for me. It was a different world. Piyu was now married. Piyu was no more the girl with t-shirts that have wise cracks and denims folded up half way through her calf. Poona was no longer about the single Jinu and single Piyu not minding being called lesbian partners and being broke to the last penny on the 16th of the month.

Poona was now about Piyu's new home - with a husband; where all said and done I would be a guest, not a room mate.

* I know, the title sounds depressing. But that's how it is to give away your best friend or your sister to someone. 

Bombay diaries

I went to Bombay, all excited since I was visiting that place after so-o-o long! When I used to be in Pune, Bombay was like second home to me. I would always take a volvo and drop in to my my brother's house as and when I wished. Then I would go around the town meeting some close and not-so-close friends. 

This time I met 2 of my closest friends, my friends from Google days. I took a local (first time all by myself) and went from Vashi until VT where Zubinder was waiting for me. He was shouting at someone over the phone. I figured out it was a gf-bf fight. My heart bled for him - he is such a sweetheart I wonder how anyone can break his heart! 

He drove me around the town and a while later we met KV over lunch and drinks at Woodside Inn in Colaba. We spoke and laughed non-stop for the next few hours. The next stop was at Gaylord's on Churchgate for some yum-yum desert. The boys then took me on 'terrorism-tourism' and showed all the places that were attacked on 26/11.

After about 6 mad hours with the 2 of them I rushed home (with my brother getting all angry) to see my youngest nephew for the first time. He looked like such a sweetheart but when my phone was chucked down from the balcony, I realized why they call him a 'terrorist.' That is exactly what he seemed. 

Now my phone had lost display and would switch on/off at its on whim. (The repurcussions of which I am still going through!) Anyway, after this was talking to bhabhi for 2 nights straight over the world's best coffee (unlimited supply) and catching up about everything. She is the one person who has taught me what ageing gracefully is all about - 13 years older than me and a mother of 2 sons, she is the most charming, witty, funny, sensible and of course, lovable person in the world. 

I do not bond so much with my brother anymore - guess he is just letting me be. But yes, I know I am still his favouritest person in the world and I think that's what matters. That old man is just awesome :) 

On 10th morning, I made the much awaited bus ride to Pune. That is the ride which brings me closest to the real me. More about it in the next post. 

...and I'm back!

No my vacation is not over still, but I have a computer with internet connection to my disposal and quite obviously I'm back to scribbling tit-bits here! As most would know, I am in the last lap of my 2 week destination, covering 3 locations - Bombay, Pune and Bangalore - in that order. 

Next few posts will give everone a snippet of my chuttis and I will add pictures very soon! 

Of weddings, reunions and fun.

I had looked forward to this time in Delhi for so long that I had started fearing it would not stand up to my expectations - and I was terribly wrong. Despite some very unfortunate events at NB's place, I managed having a gala time at the wedding and meeting the boys. 

I stayed with NB and did not sleep all night on 28th. 29th was meeting Sruthy. (it's her with the curlers, sitting at the salon.) 29th was also the night of the fancy cocktail party and seeing the boys after about 3 long years!! It was just so weird to see those college hooligans dressed in Black suits and clean shaven. We all drank and bonded over food in the cold cold Delhi evening. 

We headed home at about midnight and had another night of endless conversations. The next day was going for 'a' drink at @Live at CP in Delhi. The 'a' drink ended up being 'a few' drinks and we were scared to drive back home in the drunken state. After getting ready for the wedding, I witnessed 2 of my life's first times - 

a. A friend's wedding.

b. A BIG FAT Indian wedding. 

After attending the baraat and trying to control the drunk boys, the beauty of the ceremony started sinking in. Seeing my friend and his wife go through the rituals of a Hindu wedding somehow gave the feeling of everything being right despite all that they have gone through in the last so many months. I could not have imagined him with anyone else next to him in the 'shaadi ka mandap.' 

After saying an emotional goodbye to him (since this was a scary one!) we reaced home well past 4 am. After a couple of hours of sleep and a rather shocking news from Nidhi's uncle's place, I headed to my cousin's place and met my little niece for the first time. It was then time to meet a very very special friend over a drink - something we had planned for a long time. We then headed to his place for the rest of the evening. The night was fun - 3 movies, Maggi, cranberry juice and staying up all night. 

4 30 am was the time to leave for New Delhi station and travel back home. D dropped me to the sation and it sucked to say bye to him. I enjoyed his company so much this time around. 

I know this is a bad update for a great vacation, but the most special things in life are the most difficult to write about. 

Picture Gallery: 

* Me and NB in our same ol' pose. 

* NB and Sruthy having a giggle fit over snooty Delhi babes

* DC and Cow - after sooo long!

* Sruthy straightening her curls

* Finally - the bride and the groom at the cocktail party.