Writer's block

The title makes me look like a self proclaimed writer, but I am guessing bloggers can go this far and call themselves writers too! Or maybe typists. haha

I've been meaning to write for such a long time but I dont have much to write except for a few updates here and there... so this is more like my buzzzz posts but not half as interesting I am sure. Anyway here goes it - 

1. My folks (who I stay with out here) have gone to Goa and considering they are the people who love me the most in this world (of course after my parents) I am sure they will get me some cool stuff! I am totally looking forward to opening packet after packet of gifts! 

2. I have changed my brand of smokes (damn I hope there is no one in my family who reads this blog. Like seriously!) Anyway I've moved to Marlboro Ultra Lights and I see it as a step towards healthier lungs :P 

3. I've been going to the gym regularly. I want to lose 4kgs before August i.e my cousin's wedding. 

4. Oh wedding reminds me there was this girl (we are distant relatives. Her and my sister were very close at one point in time) who was very keen on me tying the knot with her geek brother.He is finally getting married to someone else. Phew! Techie from DCE and an MBA from LBS, they thought was reason enough for me to wanna get hitched. But no! I am destined for a whole lot of messy relationships right? So I will hang on for a while. Hmph! 

5. I am in the city that has both my ex and prospectives and neither of them know I am here. I go into the city with a constant fear of bumping into them. Sucks. 

6. It was my budds birthday yesterday and I surprised her and all that. She seemed quite excited. So was I. I love her. :) 

7. I am damn bored, I am dying to write about the voter turn out being so low and the mishaps some of my people had to face with missing names, the IPL and other stuff in general. But I am so damn bored! 

OK I'll buzz off before I rub on the boredom peeps! 

Jab We Met...!

And we finally met. Me and Utopia. Her blog and mine are different in their own stead but there is something that always clicks with some people. And it clicked with us. As fate would have it, I have landed up at the same place as her and so there was no doubt that we would meet. I thought it would be like a blind date but it wasn't. She seemed like a long lost friend with whom I was just catching up after a very very long time. We have parallel lives. We are as cool, stupid, fucked up, sensitive, emotional (or otherwise) and full of vices as the other. We spoke non stop for about an hour and half at a lovely place.

 

I won't give out anything of what we spoke, for obvious reasons - the stuff's personal. But all I will say is, she is indeed my twin (though she is way prettier!) in thought and action. Talking about meeting people, I have to fit this in! I met by bestest friend (referred to as NB and Budds in this blog) last week and we spent 5 straight hours together. I din't know I had missed her so much! Also another awesome friend of mine is gonna be back to India next week and I am meeting him too.  He is one of my few 'no-nonsense'  I-love-spending-time-with'  'endless-and-meaningful-conversations' ' drinking-buddy' and 'such-an-amazing-person' friends that I have.

 

All for swearing that I wont socialize in my 'secret location!' ! Huh.

 

Anyway other updates from me!

 

I got tanned at home, in my sleep. :| it was a cloudy afternoon with pleasant breeze so I opened the huge french windows by my bed and dozed off with a book. Only to wake up with the hot scorching sun burning me and me sweating like I was running a marathon! :(

 

I am gonna spend the month of May reading Karl Marx. I have always been intrigued by him but never read extensively to have an opinion. (Provided I finish the books by Marquez, Steinbeck, Manto, Kunzru and Fyodor that are lying on my table begging for attention!)

 

OK there were a million things I thought of this morning that I wanted to write about but they seem to have evaporated. I will buzz out with this much and will hopefully be back soon.

 

Oh just btw, welcome back PP! 

CBFC Indian Rating U/A - make sure you are 16+ or are reading this under Parental Guidance.

I made use of my 2nd most fundamental right (the 1st being the right to cast my vote) after 2 full months. The right to visit the salon. Yes. As a female citizen of a free democratic country, I see going to the salon and getting some excess hair removed and getting a massage every now and then as a fundamental right (and also a duty towards fellow citizens of both sexes :P )

I strongly believe in posting stories that are for 'family reading/viewing' and are not meant for audiences that are 18+ of age. But this one experience has forced me to break the rule and post a U/A rated post.

I went to the salon today to get a 'facial clean-up.' (That's different from a facial, for all the male species reading this.) To my utter amusement and surprise, I had a male staff member to give me the 'service.' I have gotten hair cuts and pedicures by male staff at these unisex salons but never a facial service which requires you to change into their rather skimpy and ill-fitting robes. (and so sort of makes it embarrassing to lie down on a single bed with the A/C blowing you off.) Never mind, I agreed to do the ritual, get out of my t-shirt and into the robe. The guy comes in and I am surprised. I have no clue why would such a cute/hot guy work in a salon and not model for Yamaha. Or Gillette.

So he says nothing but (the ritual is all this small talk between your salon assistant and you which almost leaves the 2 of you as best of friends at the end of those 2 hours of waxing, threading, clean-up and pedicure.) "Please lie down." It was strange and sexy in a very hollywood-ish manner. His hands started working up my neck to my chin and back to my neck and this time till my cheeks and then back to my neck and to my nose and then back to my neck and to my forehead - in slow, soft and circular motions. It was as if he was testing me and my patience by not touching my temples and eyes - which are the most relaxing parts when you get a facial massage. And when he finally reached my temples and eyes - something shot through me and sent a shiver through my spine.

He then went across to the other end of the room and this time I did not trust him to come back and do the routine but instead leave me wondering if I want to say a yes or a no. But no, he went across to the other end to fetch a big white clean towel. He says "Ma'am, you are shivering." Damnit, with those fingers and the darn A/C you think I was capable of doing anything better but shiver? Never mind, I threw a smile at him with my closed eyes. I was acting like a sly cat stealthily sipping milk hoping nobody is watching!

Now was the time to remove black heads (an utterly painful process where they squeeze your life out through your nose.) and I was dreading this. (I always do - with or without the guy!) He could see the strain on my facial muscles and said "Relax, it won't hurt much." And he took charge of my nose in a way that came across as the manliest thing ever. He did the due and said - "Here, you are done!" and the sound seemed to come from almost my nose! Hang on, it was this sly guy, so close to my nose, telling me it was all done. And I held my breath and said "thank you." when I could think of a million other variants to the acknowledgement 'thank you.'

He then put a pack on my face. By now you are supposed to be so relaxed that your face just starts glowing out of the relaxation and not exactly because of all the zillion pastes they apply on you. But today, I was more strained than I had been during my Std 10 Boards! I had clenched my fist so tight all through the last 30 - 40 mins that my nails had poked into my palm. He then said "I'll be back in 15" and he left. The way I slept after that was as if I was active on that single bed with some other activity and not a facial. I was tired of all the strong musk and the fingers working across those few inches.

I woke up when I felt those fingers, again, on my neck, cleaning the dried up face pack with a wet sponge. I was praying to God that the process ended before I could self-accuse myself of mentally molesting a poor salon assistant. I am not sure if it did. Because when I saw my face in the mirror after he left, I was sure as hell glowing ten times better than one would with an afterglow.

We're only human.

I am suffering from writer's block. So publishing an old draft. I do not believe in such long posts, but since it is there, you might as well read it. :) 

She was full of life, boisterous, well above average to look at and lived in Bombay. She loved dancing, laughed like she is on dope and danced at the slightest chance she could get. She finished college and started working. She had tonnes of friends and a loving family. 

And then there was a boy. Her brother's friend. A small town boy, blessed with a very very sharp mind, extremely ambitious and had graduated from the country's elitest educational institute. She met the boy often since he had rented out the apartment that her family owned. And he was her brother's best friend. And he fell for all the things in para 1. He begged of her to marry him, she was 2 yrs older than him. She did not feel romantically attracted to him, but she dint feel that way for anyone at that point in time. So she chose the known devil instead of the one an arranged marriage would get her.

And they tied the knot. They, just ike most newly weded couples, seemed like the happiest people in the world. They shifted base to Dubai - the land of Gold - black and yellow. They minted money but missed family. And so decided it was time for him to pursue higher eductation. Not to forget the girl was doing better than the boy at work and had managed saving a lot more. 

They came back to India and he joined the country's elitest Management Institute in an uptown place in South India. She was pregnant with their first son. She lived in an apartment close to his sister's place. And he lived on campus. She was funding his higher education. 

He made new friends who took precedence over everyone and everything in his life.  There was also a girl in the new friend circle. Life's like that - a wife finds her husband's dearest chic friend as not the best thing in the world. But this girl knew she was not so petty and that she will not hate this new girl. Friends are just friends after all and she knew she had the supreme position in his life. 

But the friendship became more than just that - ot so it seemed from the many emails that Mrs. Wife bumped into. She fell sick - asthma attacks leading to steroid shots, a baby to take care of and a rocking marriage. This took 5 years of her life - straight. Sleeplessness, sickness and the baby. 

Husband and wife moved back to Bombay and so did the new girl. She even landed up a job for herself in the same organization as the boy's to add to the wife's misery.

And when she finally decided that she'd better be getting herself a new job - to keep her mind away from what's been happening and in the worst case scenario - if they were to split, she would have the means to raise her child single handedly. 

But she had sent her husband for an MBA, she was just a post-graduate and had touched number 30 as her age. Jobs weren't easy to come in Bombay. So she compromised. She started letting go of things. She shut her eyes to the obvious. She was done with arguing with her husband about what the long phone calls, emails and gifts meant. She was done with listening to the same answer - "It's nothing! She is just a friend for God's sake!" 

And the friend is now reluctantly getting married. With wife at the hosptial out of yet another ailment, the husband still decides to travel 500 miles to her wedding. Priorities. 

The wife knew her husband loved her and not the friend. But it was difficult to see it. His actions were not indicating it. May be she was thinking wishfully. She was risking it all again - she was pregnant with her second baby. And she knew with 2 children and no job, there was no looking back for her in life. She had to make peace with herself. And with her husband's friend. She knew she was jealous and reading too much between the lines. But she couldn't help it. She was but human. 

* This is a true story. The friend' marriage, they say, has not consummated. The wife is busy putting a smiling facade and taking care of 2 lovely boys. The husband, now a father, beams with pride each time he sees his sons and seems to thank his wife each time he looks at her - for being such a stoic through 8 years. 

BRB

P.S: Inspired by J 

Bhopal Chronicles

So here we are at the end of another chapter. I came here 8 months ago, with a lot of apprehensions in mind. I hadn't lived with family since I was 15 years old, so I was a lil scared. though I was glad that I'd be by myself  without a social circle harassing me and demanding my time and attention.

 

Little did I know that I'd miss my friends and the otherwise annoying acquaintances so badly. This did not mean I had enough time to read and pursue hobbies. I spent most of my time loitering with momma and going mad at these local markets where you get the most exquisite of stuff. If I were to rate my stay on a scale of ten, it would be a 7.5 (Poona - 9/10    Hyd 6/10. Other places do not need a mention.)

 

Here are some snippets from my stay -

 

Shopping - This place has no Shoppers' Stop for your air-conditioned shopping pleasure. But those lanes at Chowk Bazaar, Peer Gate. Lakherpura and New Market can rob you of your family fortune and leave you asking for more. The stuff here is dirt cheap if compared with bigger towns. Handicrafts,  footwear, garments, tapestry, home décor - you name it and you get it (in such variety that the inability to buy them all is frustrating!)

 

Food - There is this lil place called Swad Bhandar where you get the yummiest samosas and mirchi bajjis and jalebis and gulab jamuns in the world! A sumptuous brunch-ish breakfast for 4 will cost you 50 bucks. Yes fifty INR. The chaat, pani-puri, local flavors of soup, alllll the bhajiyas and makke di rotis and chhola bhatura and puri bhaaji and juice and lassi… oh God! Oh I don’t mean it is road-side food all the way! The palaces turned into hotels - Jehan Numa, Noor-Us-Subah, Imperial Sabre - they are kickass too! Just by the way, I am a vegetarian and they say I haven't lived in Bhopal if I havent tasted the nawabi kebabs. So you can imagine.

 

Friends - One and only Sebin. I bumped into him somewhere like we were destined to meet and he was my thread to sanity. Not a single soul I had here to socialize with. We've done not many crazy things if I were to compare with my Poona/Hyd etc days but my memories with him are some of the fondest. Oh him being a bassist in a local rock band also came handy. He kept me up-to-date with all the developments in the world of rock!

 

Studies - well the idea was to chillax and take GMAT. It turned out to be a bad idea. Let's not talk about it anymore.

 

Work - Worked at a start-up and got doomed financially. Learnt the most key-skills of my professional life in that period though. Also learnt that working with a bunch of smartass people at Google is bloody different  than working (read: much more challenging) with a bunch of demotivated, disinterested, passionless people!

 

Blog - I started blogging about 3 years ago and did not write more than 5 posts in a year. Then I created a new blog - this one that you are reading - when I came to Bhopal. And I managed about 135 posts in 7 months. Not bad huh? And I made some new acquaintances over blogosphere and came really close to some people whom I had known earlier. This blog was my lone source of time pass and venting out when I felt my Mom could not take anymore of my nonsense.

 

Now that I am moving on, I know not much will change in my blog - it will be the usual ranting about friends, family, myself, politics etc. But this is a nice time to thank each one of you who have frequented my blog, posted nice comments and welcomed by thoughts.

 

I am moving to a secret location - taking a 24 hour train ride (yipee! I love'em!) and landing in a new world to make a new start - for no particular reason. Just because I feel like it. So this is my last post until say 8th or 9th of this month.
 

So I will see you people soon! Keep those comments flowing. :) 

Disclaimer - Very personal-diary-ish post. Don't read if you are in the mood for some entertainment.

Chalo, I might as well write about it. 

I dont cry. I hate crying and people who cry overtly. Unfortunately I am sourrounded by these super emotional people who cry at the flick of a finger. 

I am also quite curt when I am pissed off. I do not pass false statements or make false allegations and am as fair as one can be in a sticky situation. BUT, if I am irritated I will state facts in a way that can pierce through people. Ask my best friends. 

And I did that today. With guess who? Daddy. I said something which is true but I put it in a very painful manner. Luckily, Dad wasn't there and Mom heard it. Mom is one of the super emotional people I was talking of earlier. A tear rolled down her cheek and damnit. I lost it. I knew I said something very mean. And then there was no stopping me. I cried. I cried through out the evening. I think all the emotions I held in the last 15 months came out like Niagara falls. 

Mom was shocked. This was the first time she'd seen me crying. I cried and I cried. And I slept. I woke up and looked at myself in the mirror. I looked like such a disaster. My eyes had become so small and puffy and I really looked damn weird. In fact 6 hours past and I still don't look like myself. Damnit I have some super pretty chic friends who cry on a daily basis. They'd look stunning if they stopped crying I think. 

I am off for dinner with parents. My faith is reaffirmed that as long as my parents are here, I don't need to worry about a damn thing. Even if I were paralytic and cent percent immobile, I can still live with the 'jinu-smile' intact. And I will definitely sail through this patch of monetary instability. Courtesy parents and of course Sony. 

That was such a 'personal-diary-ish' post. 

But dearest friends, I mean cars, alas! must part.

Sigh… yet another goodbye. No, no one's getting married this time. The Maruti Zen which has given us girls, undeniably, the best times of our life is being sold off.

 

'Us girls' refers to the gang of 6 crazy girls 5 of whom have been together since Std 11 and a new entry in Second Yr college. We had 3 scooties among the 5 of us until 2nd year of college. In those 4 years we have traversed the length and breadth of Poona in a way that no one else would have in their lifetime. We have jumped signals for kicks (come on! We were young girls, we are excused silly behavior!) and lied to cops and cried at the police station for hours (trying to look as natural as we could in the midst of giggle fits.) when those lil bikes were towed away.

 

Our first time out together was in 11th Std - pizzas, wine and trying smokes for the first time in of those lanes at Koregaon Park - Some of us were nervous, some were drunk and some were trying to figure out how a cigarette is lit. But all of us were enjoying. That evening made one of us a smoker, one of us a drunkard (well almost) and 2 of us found a strange connection with each other with food being the path.

 

We continued eating and drinking and loving each other. And then one of us bought a car - a Maruti Zen. And there was a new girl with curls like no one else. And she had a connection with us - of drinking and eating.  That was the turning point. The scooties would only take us to a common destination from where we would load ourselves into the car. And the eating and drinking increased manifold since the sun, rain and nigh time could not harm us much now and since there was a new person to join us. The love was showered on the Zen too. The Zen has seen 3 of us bitch about the other 3 (many times in different permutations). It has seen 5 of us laugh like the world's ending and one of us crying like there's no tomorrow. It has cooperated in every single insane prank played by the owner. It has taken us to college, to the court, to the university, to clubs, pubs, restaurants, movie halls, NDA, Khadakwasla, Lonavla, railway station, bus stops  where not.

 

It has been 5 years since the Zen has lugged us every damn where. And seen us becoming more than just eating/drinking friends. It has seen us become professionals, exchanging business cards. It has seen us become each other's lifelines. Today we are an integral part of each other despite the different professions we are in and the different geographic locations we live in. And the Zen knows it. It knows what we mean to each other and what it means to us.

 

The Zen is making its last sacrifice in a few days - It will sell itself off for making the down payment for a new Fully automatic Honda City with Racing features. I hope the Honda City will love us as much. We'll try to love it too. But we never know.

* The pictures of the Zen will be up soon. As of now, please manage with a pic of us. This was the last time we went to Lonavla in the Zen...

But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads?

Guess what?! I watched TV today... like not news, but other entertainment channels. (Indian politics and other news items are also entertaining, not denying it.) These are my observations from the minute I switched on the TV - 

1. TATA Sky is awesome. I mean digital TV is better than cable TV. We've had digital TV for the last many years (since it was launched in India) but I think today was when I actually watched TV with like loads of attention. It makes the 'surfing' and the viewing experience so much better. 

2. There is no dance show like Boogie Woogie. It's been there since I was in school, like 4th Std or something. Off late there have been shows like Nach Baliye, Jhalak Dikhlaja, Dance India Dance and what not. They are these melodramatic shows with little or no real talent. But boy the talent Boogie Woogie contestants have, it is crazy. I watched it today again and the way Javed, Naved conduct the show is plain, simple and nice. 

3. It is bloody IPL time!!! Are my esteemed readers aware that I am this crazy cricket fanatic!? Yes I can even watch test matches, 5 days at a row with not necessarily India featuring in it. And I feel SO damn guilty that I still don't know the IPL team composition. :( My Sunday schedule is to figure out which team has which players and choose my team. (Since I am more of an Indian than a Punjabi, Hyderabadi or a Delhiite, I will choose my team totally bias-free)

Ok now beyond TV - 

I am damn happy today, for no particular reason. :))) Yes, I am all smiles! I have a few movies that I can watch tonight and some kickass books lined up for my reading pleasure. I am all set to pack my bags and to go awayyy! (I am not thinking of the other not-so-pleasant things which I have no control over.) 

Aren't ya'll happy for me? :) 

Sending loads and loads of hugs and kisses for allll of you who need it. :)

* Oh btw, I have put on weight. Not being sad (decided not to) but just letting you know. Will go for a run from Wednesday onwards. And will start gyming from April 10th. OK Tata ByeBye.

Buzzzzzzzz.....

I had to write. There is no other way out. There are just tooooo many thoughts out there.

 

1. 1. I don’t want to talk to anyone. Nor do I want to listen.  I will not answer phone calls, fine. But how do I tell my folks at home? They look forward to me coming home so that they can talk and hear me talk. Sigh! But I am so glad I am up here in my room for the next 8 hours.

 

2. 2. I can't wait to go away, now that I know I am going away. And it is upsetting to see mom so upset about it. She ain't saying it loud but drops these rather loud hints. Their insecurity is killing me. They feel I'll never be with them again. Eight damn years I stayed away and 8 months suddenly make them so miserable? They talk things like - "us oldies of the family should settle down in one place." Hell it makes me feel as if they are all gonna build themselves a freakin old age home!

 

I don’t know about uncles and aunts but my parents sure deserve better. And me and sister are more than clear about it. Mom still hasn’t lived her dream of wearing nice frocks with a hat and walking on the streets of London on a sunny day. How can she even TALK about that stupid old age home setting! Disgusts me.

 

3. 3. Everyone in my family (even distant relatives)  is killing himself/herself (and me in the process) over  my B-school. I wonder why they are obsessing so much. I wanted to do the damn MBA because I thought what they teach out there is fab if you went to the right place. Precisely why all the struggle to go to that damn Harvard. But now I've started feeling/behaving like a stubborn child who doesn't want to do something because everyone else is insisting.

 

Hell, why can't people tell me that I should do what I want to. Why do they start the sentence with -" I want you to…."  To hell with what you want!

 

4. 4. Good things that happen in a day help us live with the not-so-good things. Every stage of my life I have come across someone who is very much like me. Like really very much. And this person has just appeared from nowhere, clicked in one go and stayed forever or for really long in my life. It has happened again. Utopia she is. My blogger twin. Our wavelengths (read: embarrassing stories and weird minds) matched and we confided in each other quite a bit right on our 2nd chat. We haven't met yet and I already feel awesome about her. Welcome to my life,  girl. Hope you are here to stay! And yes, I'll see you in April.

 

       5.  My company is broke. Momentarily. And the auspicious moment happens to be the time I am also quitting! They owe me about a lakh of rupees. And I have no idea if they will clear my dues this 31st (my last day!) or not. As you all know I am being shipped to a secret location. But hell, the secret location is this expensive tier 1 city of India. Damn I need the freakin dough! 

Yes there's dad but come on! It is weird to just keep taking non-stop. He is not a very rich man. It is kinda strange but for the first time I am feeling crushed because of finances. I've seen more than enough financial crunches but never felt so disheartened and never have I been upset for days over it. May be it is the 6 figure that's making it difficult. God please, I need you to intervene.

 

Thanks guys, for putting up with this insipid post about my insipid life.

 I sound like such a cry baby. Shit. 

...yet again about elections - you think I'm diseased?

Ok please excuse me, I am still obsessing over the elections. Kindly bear with me -

 

I was watching an early morning show on NDTV which is called 'Youth for change.' The journo went to Presidency college, Kolkata and was talking to the students. They are the typical intellectual student community  but have a long way to go. When asked about how would they choose their leader, they spoke of Recession and Terrorism - definitely 2 big issues at the moment but not the only criteria for choosing your Government for the next term. I don't blame them poor kids. When I was their age, I am sure even I spoke of the topics that had max media coverage.

 

What I am trying to say is - it is important for media houses to educate these collegians into the nitty gritties of policy issues. There is a whole game of geo-politics, (which I think should be an important factor while choosing leaders ) issues of trade agreements and the stand of different parties on these issues and very importantly - the issue of the poor of the country - food, clothing, shelter. Transparency, governance, sustainability etc are some other important aspects. And I say these should be looked into while peaking at agendas and manifestos because a political parties stand on these important issues determines the nation's growth. It is a cumbersome process and there is nothing like some solid tv show/road show talking about these things and creating mass appeal.

 

I honestly think we have to move beyond talking about the most talked stuff. 

Growing up is a process. Not an event.

Ok so it seems I am growing up... or is old the word? Ok no, I am growing up. 

I can feel the change in me. I no more want to wear my t-shirts with those skulls drawn on them and stupid wise-cracks. Those denims cut into half and those crazy cargo pants are all gone now. I have moved to wearing simpler tees, I am no more wearing shorts and parading around the town. I wear nice striped and buttoned shirts to work. I enjoy wearing those pretty kurtas and nice churidars. Make me feel like a girl. I like it I think. :) 

I do not melt as rapidly anymore. I know late night phone calls don't always mean something. I do not approve of things I cannot live with. For ex. Someone is a bad listener but otherwise sweet? To hell with you - good listener is top 3 in my list of criteria. And I am addressing my needs and not compromising anymore. 

I am more aware of the fact that my parents are growing old. Daddy is daddy and not Rambo. They need to and want to be closer to their siblings. I won't fuss around about not being in the North. Let them be where they find peace. I am also in terms with the compromises that I will have to make as I settle down. Settling down itself will be a compromise for a compulsive nomad like me. But I will. For the love of parents. They will eventually need to be taken care of. 

I am not anti-discipline anymore. On second thoughts, I never was. But I am not fussy about restrictions and deadlines any more. Some age old rules like don't be out all alone until too late in the night and don't spend forever over the fone suddenly seem to be making sense. Or maybe because I know that these are probably my last 2 weeks with parents for a really really long time. So I am ready to live with all this. 

I still like my rock music and I still wear my iPod around my neck 24/7. I still haven't gotten rid of my fettish for crazy bags and footwear. But I think it's fine. I still miss my friends like crazy. (which should now reduce. Sooner the better.)

I am looking forward to making my coffee myself and toasting my bread myself. I am looking forward to not getting idlis and aloo-paratha on demand. I am looking forward to not going to office. I know it can be really tough living with the person with whom I am going to be with for the next few months. But it's fine. She loves me. So what if she is a little irrational, she means no harm afterall. 

I know none of these things seem like great signs of 'growing up' to most of you. I am someone who was always very practical, matter-of-factly and almost always did 'the right thing'. But the wild-child used to come out with vengeance every now and then - with those crazy ass, unimaginable things I would do. That wild-child is now settling down. I am doing the right things not because they are supposedly right but because now no other way seems to exist. 

Though I really wish, hope, pray I won't smile any lesser with the wild-child dying down. 

The 8 week break in the 8th city for those 8 months after those 8 years.

Alright Mike! It’s time for some change! Parents will probably shift base from North India to South India - roots calling it seems! Which means I will also shift base - but not to where ma-pa will go. I am off to another city - a city where almost all my love(ed ones/rs hehehe) live! And guess what? I am not allowed to tell anybody that I am in that city!

 

According to my parents, this is supposedly a break where I concentrate only and only on my exams and catch up on some reading and exercising. They think 8 months is too long to stay with parents after 8 years of staying alone - and they are freakin right! So this is an 8-week paid break to do my thing in a lavish 4 bedroom apartment with everything being taken care of! So what If I wont have company, never mind I can indulge into some ones-rampant vices of my life and get a kick ;-)

 

So I am damn glad I have parents who understand and know me so well. It is hard to be in 'that' city and not tell anyone. :( But what the hell, it's only 8 weeks and neither me or them are dying without each other. This is my last chance to redemption. And I owe my parents (and myself) some real ass-kickin' scores and a feckin' awesome admit. And to hell with everything else.

 

Though I am really concerned if my Telugu-turned-Hindi parents will ever manage being Hindi-turned-Telugus!

 

And in case I din't say it before, this will be the 8th town I'd be moving to in my life! So many 8s... hmmm… an 800 score on GMAT is next, may be? :D

 

 

Happy Birthday Chonikudi!

I once convinced a girl 5 years older than me that I am the female-avataar of lord Krishna and that she should touch my feet. That way I would free her of all her woes. And she did. That girl was my elder sister.

 

Things haven't changed much yet. She continues to be my elder sister and I continue to take her on a ride every now and then. Though she is living the promise I made to her. She continues to free me, the lord, of all woes. She is not just my sister - she is my life, my love, my everything. We have moved past being each other's friends, philosophers and guides. Now there is only word that can explain what Sony means to me - she means life to me. Literally.

 

We have been and continue to be each other's pets.

 

I have never felt so crippled in expressing love for someone. So I will skip that part and will scribble a few crazy things I remember about us -

 

1. My earliest memories - She used to read out loud tables from 2 to 10. She was so loud and she read them so often that when I was 3 years old, I knew by heart all of them. I am not kidding.

 

2. She would let me sleep during study hours (since I used to be perennially sleepy. Not like things have changed much now) on one condition - that she gets to sketch/paint secretly (yes, she is an awesome artist) in the disguise of those long books.

 

3. We would go out to play with the kids in the neighborhood and she would make sure I do not lose the game or have to do any of those annoying things like chasing people in a running game. She knew my legs hurt and I cannot pace up with the boys.

 

4. She would tell me amusing stories of the exciting life she lived, all alone, in Poona. And all that I wanted back then was join her the very next year. And I did.

 

5. Poona would obviously not be one hundredth as nice for me if not for her. We went EVERYWHERE ourselves. We would fill the fuel tank in our scooty/activa and go around the town. Like one end to the other - with NO work! Yes… we would just go roam about, check out guys, eat something cheap if we were hungry. We did not need friends, boy friends, family nothing. We were so-o-o self sufficient and probably the happiest duo in the entire town. Even now, the thing we tell each other during tough times is - "kanna, don't worry. I'll soon come and we'll go ride around the town. Ok?"

 

6. And a birthday memory - we would go to Ganpati temple in the morning, then Idli breakfast, then movie tix, visit to aunt's house, lunch (egg curry and roti) at east street, movie at west end and THEN meet friends well after 6 in the evening. That was routine for both birthdays.

 

7. She was my bank, my ATM. We never took extra money from parents for our frivolous expenses. Sony would work part time at some place or the other and we would spend every single penny on having fun - movies, fancy food, some clothes, anything!

 

8. We have counseled each other about every single thing in life. We have no secrets. NO SECRETS AT ALL. There is only one person the world I share my passwords with and that's her. And I know no one will ever get that right. I repeat - no one.

 

9. There are soooo many other things I can't and won't write on this blog. Except that I have been with her on every single birthday of hers, save this one. Yes, it's her birthday today and we only love each other 100 times more than how much we did a year ago. We can't help it. We are addicted to each other.

 

Happy Birthday Sony. I promise you will see me on the cover of TIME magazine soon. I love you. 

P.S: Sony's real name is Sonali. We call each other the same names, but the ones exclusive for her are Chonee and Chonikudi. :) 

Sporadic and not ______

It is easier to write about politics and cricket than to write about my life these days. Good sign or bad?

 

I worked out today. After really long. And I could hear the joints creaking, saying thank you. Thank you for making use of us and waking us up from this slumber after 2 full months. I am loving that pull in my thigh and the way my arm moves only in one direction. I chucked a sweaty t-shirt into the washing machine after so long. I love how I hate to have hair on my neck after a workout session. The lightness of being.

 

No, I haven't paid up at the gym yet. Because it's expensive and I am perennially broke. And no, I did not go by the beautiful lake for a run. I fear street dogs and mom fears rowdies. So it was jogging at home, stairs for the stepper, the usual crunches on the floor and a whole lot of dancing to some club music. Yes, about an hour and half of total work out. And I feel lighter. Physically and mentally.

 

I wonder what came to me today but I read some old emails and some old notes/diaries. Ok, maybe they are not so old after all. I felt damn sad for the way things, relationships and some people turned out to be. I was trying damn hard to feel some anger for those people, but unfortunately I could not move beyond sadness. Wonder why I take charge of things in such a Gandhi-an style.

 

Utopia posted the song Lucky (Jason Mraz and Colbie) on her blog and said she hasn't been lucky. (read the lyrics to get the context.) I had been lucky ones and trashed it out the window. It's excused. We were only kids then. And another time, never realized I could and should have gotten lucky. So scared I was. And so was he. Shame on us. We know how we felt. 

And now, I know why some people say they sing well. They want me to ask them to sing. But I won't. Boys singing and the after-effects have always been quite disastrous. And I know my lack of any particular fondness for Orchids (and other flowers), Violins (and other stringed instruments), late-night phone calls (and sms-es), and similar 'sweet' things ticks off some people. But I can't help it. I've faked fondness a couple of times to realize how much I end up disliking the people who make me fake it. Let's have it the other way round this time. You hate me instead. 

 

I spent about 4 hours with my GMAT books. Do you know spending time with books does not equate to studying? Seriously. It doesn't. But I am an optimist. I hope I will spend the next 2 hours doing SOMETHING constructive at least. That bitch of an exam has to be dealt with. Boredom, please come by a little later. I swear I am busy. 

Lok Sabha Elections and my wasted obsession!

It is not easy being a 24 year old MBA aspirant during days of stunted economic growth and political instability. Though it helps that my dad is a public-sector employee without the threat of recession lurking over his head.

 

My blog might make people think I am obsessed with politics and elections. But the turn of events in the last few months have been such that I can't seem to get the damn thing out of my mind. Today I spent about 3 hours reading up about various political parties and alliances and their election agenda/manifestos etc. At the end of it I concluded that which people have known since age eternity -

 

Politicians go blind in the love of power. They completely forget the cause for which they should be contesting an election.

There cannot be 75% votes for any one party and it will no doubt be a coalition government. (The very thought scares me. There should be a way if the resultant PM is the likes of Mayawati, we as public are able to discard her as our national leader.)

 

If we look at a hypothetical situation where every constituency elects the best people's representative for  lok-sabha, we can still not guarantee that the party with the best national leader will win the election, since all parties are mixed baskets - rotten apples and nice apples.

 

In another situation, If people casted votes for party 'X' since it has the best prime-ministerial candidate, it does not mean the local representative at the lok sabha will do any good for his constituency. He might be the biggest convict in your locality, for all you know. If Rahul Gandhi for instance is your next dream leader, it will mean electing congress in local constituencies and you might just have to vote for a 80 year old murder for that lok-sabha seat of your constituency!

 

Also, the point to note is, the affairs of the state are handled by the state govt. and so the entire mess of  how do you maintain sync in lok-sabha and rajya-sabha elections. Plus you never know which small party or independent candidate will go shake hands with whom. Uff!

 

The conclusion being it is anyway a Catch 22 situation for 'aam junta' like us. And we cannot deny it, there will still be security slip-ups and corruption no matter which ever party rules. Ours is a bloody big country and running it in a corporate setting is such a stupid pipe-dream.

 

Ideally, there have to be 543 clean-record educated candidates for EACH and EVERY constituency of India. I am not talking about 'cool, suit-tie' leaders but a very well planned system where these candidates go through rigorous training for understanding the problems in their constituency and state-of-affairs of the country in general AND THEN they go campaigning in such a way that they win both urban and rural votes. Let's face it, most of our population is in the villages and they care 2 hoots if you are from IIT. But if you really ARE from IIT and able to answer their questions about food, clothing and shelter - you have BOTH rural and urban votes. City lads love it if you are that crème with the nation as your cause.

 

And these educated people will make educated choices - the professionals like IAS, IPS officers, bureaucrats etc will help them learn these nitty-gritties and make wise choices.

 

Oh I know I've been brooding too much over it and I also feel terrible for being the only-words-no-action bloggers, but I don't know how to start! Else I swear I would have. The logistics are just so complicated and daunting! And this is where the doom begins - so many of jinus blogging and unable to use technology to make a real difference. Sigh!

 

* A quick snippet - 

UPA = UPA +Trinamool - SP

NDA = NDA -BJD

Third Front = Communists + assorted regional parties

Expect this equation to keep changing till we go to the polls and after it as well.

Resources - http://www.indian-elections.com/ and today's edition of TOI and HT! 

Buzzzzzzzz.... again!

OMG I am DYYINNGGG to write about the usual... I could have done with an interesting climax-filled post for all the not-so-eventful events of life but I'll just cut the crap and will make do with a simple, no nonsense update. 

Dad slipped and fell off in the bathroom at some hotel room in a town where he'd gone for a few days. Dad being dad took it lightly only to realize that the rods in his arm from the accidenta couple of years ago (dreadful and nighmarish yet miraculous escape and life being given back by some strange power) had slipped a few inchess and poked his bone. He was rushed back to town and a few x-rays concluded that all the 3 rods (including the ones on his leg) had to be removed. I spent 4 days at the hospital, sleeping on the sofa and eating almost nothing. It is the toughest thing to see - parents going through all this. 

I read Utopia's latest post and went into 8X rewind into my life - all the people with gruffy voices, beautiful eyes, givers, takers and so many other people who made me wait eagerly and nervously for something. Like 10th Board results. I suddenly realized I think of all those people fondly but there is no one these days who makes me queasy in my stomach or makes me look at the phone until the battery drains out of unlocking and locking it or makes me refresh my emails every 90 seconds. Sigh....! It is so weird - when we want it, we dont get it. When we get it, we dont want it...and that's life they say. 

I am so career obsessed that I think I have lost all understanding of why actually I want that MBA from a dream school. What's painful is that my obsession is not turning out to be fruitful. I wonder how I've become such a procrastinator and a lazy bum. The morning jogs arent happening, the sitting with books isnt happening, the taking charge of life is not happening... I even know all the gyan about getting my ass down to doing things etc. But I just feel like i want to do nothing!! 

OK too much cribbing is bad for both me and the blog...so I will stop here wondering about my favorite topics - my career and the phone that no more makes me stare at it... 

Rights and Duties go hand in hand.

This is what most of us did over the last few months/years - 

We blogged and bitched about blasts in Jaipur, Bangalore Gujarat, the economic melt down, about Mumbai attacks, and about our ever favorite topics - Shiv Sena, Ram Sene and communism. With or without blogs, we still bitched a lot about Fodder scam, Tehelka, Bofors, Naxals, LTTE, Godhra, Babri Masjid, Ayodhya, Flight hijacks, safety slip ups etc etc. 

We shouted out to the world about how open minded and awesome our generation is. 

We felt proud that we are aware citizens who speak our mind out and do not mind protesting, creating focus groups etc. We bitched non stop with our pride intact and concluded event after event that we need a better leader. 

Until someone someday shook us and said - 

"Bob, the farmers and the slum dwellers go and vote. Not you. So bastard/bitch just shut the f*** up and live with it. And if you can't, go and cast your damn vote." (If no one ever said this to you - then consider me telling this to you on behalf of every single awakened Indian citizen.) 

To cut the long story short - if you are a blogger or even remotely tech savvy and happen to come across this - I will urge you to get your voter ID card and cast your vote. If you thought the entire process is painfully long, there is www.jaagore.com which not only makes the process just 5 mins long, but also helps you get rid of a few voting myths. 

I have a voter ID card and I voted for the state elections last year. Elections are around the corner again and I will vote again. And I will vote each time there is an election in my country - so that I can write about issues that matter to me and not feel guilty. I don't want to carry the burden of being a poor citizen. It is a big weight to carry. I am a proud daughter, sister, friend and a proud individual. I want to be a proud citizen too. 

I also know that casting your vote is just step-1. Step 2 probably is trying to clean the nation by getting our hands into the muck - Yes, to contest elections. It might take us about 3 decades to cleanse and purify this mess. But at least we will be a part of the change, a catalyst and will give a happy nation to our future generations.

If you are reading this post, I will love it if you leave your comment and tell me if you

a. have a voters ID card (if not, you know that www.jaagore.com is the place to go.)

b. will cast your vote this year. If not, then why. 

I understand very well that it is my most fundamental right and my most important duty - to vote. I will fight until my last breath for the right to vote and will perform my duty as reliogiously as I brush my teeth. 

P.S - A special note for my non-Indian readers - This post stands true for you too, as long as you come from a democratic country where you have the right to vote. After all, if all the nations of the world have good leaders, we can all peacefully co-exist. 

A Social Retard - Me.

So it seems I've found the right word for all these posts about my lonely friend-less life.

 

The word is called 'Social Retard.' (Applause!!)

 

The citation goes - This individual has received a degree in 'Sciences of Social Impediment' and is called a Social Retard.

 

Before I go any further, I'd like to give due credit to the source of this word and thank him for introducing this powerful, all-encompassing word in my rather retarded social dictionary.

 

Yes, I am a graduate in Social Retard sciences. How does one get the degree? It is simple.

 

Step 1 - If you are reading this post either on a weekend or when evening has gone a few shades darker - then you already clear the entrance exam.

 

Step 2 - Think about the days  you were busy doing something else at this hour of the day. (If you never were busy doing anything other than reading/blogging/watching tv and similar solitary acts, then congratulations! You are a bloody born Social Retard! Go get your degree printed on black with Gold.)

 

If you were busy some other day at this time watching a movie with friends/having coffee with them or sipping beer/watching porn/packing your bags to travel or any such exciting activity then you can move to step 3.

 

Step 3 - Ask yourself - "will I be doing this sometime soon? Maybe tomorrow or maybe in a week's time? If your answer is yes, then I am sorry to say you cant even get the certificate. You are socially active.

 

Step 4 - If your answer was no and you went in to this day-dream-ish mode, thinking of all the nice times and how you haven't had them in so long, then congratulations! You have passed the certificate course in being a Social Retard.

 

Behold! Step 5 is for degree holders!

 

Step 5 - If you are continuously thinking of the fun times long gone and of how this blog/web world is your only friend. If you identify more as 'unscrupulous hot hunk' or 'worldofmine' or 'morbidthoughts' or 'techjunkie' and similar such names then yes, you are a big social retard. If you are done and over with missing your friends and have accepted that you won't have any real offline friends to go for a drink with and your only connection with 'real' people is through the phone or facebook then woohoo! You are a graduate in Social Retard Sciences. Like me. 

Muthalik FAQ

How many pink chaddis did Muthalik receive?

 

About 50K… and do not forget, that's a small fraction of the actual mass of the forward, pub going women.

 

What is Muthalik's reaction?

 

He must be thinking of selling the chaddis off, but no one wants to buy chaddis with cuss words written all over with black marker-pens!

 

Wasn't he gonna send Pink Sarees?

 

Dude! He never thought he'd have to send out 50K odd sarees!!! His 'sene' will need to sell itself off to pay for so many sarees!

 

What will he do now?

 

Unable to sell the chaddis, he must have given out to his sainiks to distribute them to their girl friends. His next step is to sue all of us 'loose, pub going and forward women' (jokes jokes all the way!!)

 

Will the loose women like being sued?

 

Hell yes! I  I'd love to have in my name such a law suit and maybe even be jailed for a few days with pub going, loose and forward women like me. :D It will be one helluva party!! 

 

What if they manage to shut all the pubs in cities?

 

Tell me, will Rihaana stop spinning music? Will Kingfisher stop producing beer? Will Bose and Creative stop producing Bass Booster Speakers? Will we forget how to light a cigarette? Will parents of our rich friends sell off their farm houses? Long live house-parties!!!

  

So what’s the conclusion?

 

Even if all the pubs were to shut, Beach parties, river side parties, rave parties, farm house parties etc which have been going on since eternity, on the sly, will continue being there. We will continue the pub culture even without the pubs and we will continue being loose, cheap and wasted. We like it like that.

 

Mind it, we will still manage getting married to these really awesome men at age 27, quit smoking and drinking, and breed children who will continue our legacy of being cheap, forward, loose, drunkard pub-goers.

 

Tell me Mr. Muthalik what will you do of us? Your 'sene' is just too small in size for us wasted pub goers. Go do whatever you can.  

Freedom of action, not consequence.

Ok I know all the jazz about it being of little consequence when we start pondering over decisions already taken. The deal here is, this one decision I was so proud of until last evening is making me miserable today. Here goes the long story -

 

7 months ago, I chose to come back home and stay with family, after eight long years,  to a rather small town. This small town has no one that I can refer to as 'friends' and a 'friend circle' except for this little college going kid who is my only source of arbit muse.  Now, as most of you would know (personally or through the blog) I have always been surrounded by a whole bunch of  friends - beer buddies, emo buddies and the likes.  I haven't had a routine or schedule per se in any of those 8 years. I haven't slept for more than 4 - 5 hours each night. Socializing, drinking, getting wasted after all demands time!

 

And the days I wasn't socializing, I would either sit at that corner table at Barista - sip Brrista Frappe, smoke about 6 classic milds and either talk non-stop or listen non-stop. (Or maybe read/gaze non-stop.)Then there was always my iPod - fully charged around my neck like a school-tie. If I wasn't willing to get bitten by mosquitoes at 8 PM and drag myself out of the coffee shop, I'd go home straight from office - switch on the little TV, sit on the bean(less) bag or the long comfy cane chair with a drink (smirn-off was ever present in our apartment) and our oh-so-famous eco-friendly ash tray* and get semi high. (More because of the milds than the smirnoff) I would then either make Dal chawal for myself (and if required for NB and cams) or ask Cams to get something packed for me to eat. I would blissfully watch TV, interrupted by ever-welcome phone calls from sister dear.

 

Or sometimes plug my iPod to the huge creative speakers, play some insane bhangra/club music and try damn hard to shake a leg (I have 2 left feet, but I manage dancing at clubs with some close friends.) These were also the times when I would think about the long spans of (not-so)single-dom (that my friends do not comprehend. I have a knack of attracting/getting attracted to Mr. Wrongs.) And then naturally, I like to think of things that are supposed to be more in my control - like higher studies. So there are these recurring thoughts of taking GMAT and fleeing to a far off land.

 

And on that one day when NB and Cams, the catalysts of my thought process were not in town - I put down my papers at Google. I was convinced that only all the stress and pressure of being jobless can make me focus on GMAT. I (wrongly) thought I was done with drinking, smoking, getting wasted. Little did I know that though that wasn't me in entirety, it was a large part of me for sure - No, not the drinking smoking, but I missed being by myself and the randomness that comes along.

 

I was too eager to pack up and leave - and I did. No divine force told me that these are the last few precious months with Cams before he ties the knot or before NB moves to Delhi. And the taking the test and screwing it up like never before, is all history. Oh how can I forget, GMAT also brought along bloody relationship(t)s and dumb, unnecessary heart breaks. Hmph!

 

Fast forwarding from September 2008 until yesterday evening.

 

I told NB last evening how proud I was of myself for having broken out of the Google comfort zone (I still am.) but today - today is the day of reckoning. I am very sure I am stuck in the painful number game (I love my parents just too much to want to break out of it right now.) I am 24, so by 26 I should finish MBA so that either I find a boy or they find me one and then I 'settle down.' Yes, settle down in an ugly and monotonous routine. Like the one I have now - wake up, have breakfast, go to work, come back, watch the same soap on TV and then the same news channel and have dinner and go to my room and either read or blog. Do you see the missing and the most vital element? Social circle and me being me - yes!

 

So now that I can't get out of the number game, the only way out is to give myself a deadline for GMAT, take the damn exam and ace it, meanwhile job hunt at a different place in these economically wasted times. Which reminds me, there is some more frustration - I haven't been paid in the last 3 months and I can feel the pinch/slap/bang/rape that finances (or the lack of them) can cause/afflict. Anyway, coming back, all I can do is bloody focus for the next 3 odd months (HOW?!) and then get the fuck out of this place. (excuse the language, there is no other way of expression that's apt here.)

 

Wish me luck. I am dead bored of the way life's been treating me or vice versa.

 

* I have requested for the photographs. They'll be up shortly.

Same things, I know! I was tagged again...

Like FB wasn't enough! Ok so here are the 25 things about me - all over again. People like PP and Gale can skip reading this post :P 

This one wasn't so tough since I did this a while ago on my other blog - so just a copy-paste with a few edits here and there! (Excuse me if it is painfully long!) I know most of us have done it already. I won't tag anyone but feel free to do it if you want to. 

1. I love all seasons. I have told myself in every season - THIS is my favorite season. But in reality I like every season equally. I love winters, summers, rains, winds, stillness, grey skies, blue skies - everything.

2. In my bag you will ALWAYS find - Vaseline, iPod, comb (not hair-brush) and Hanuman Chalisa.

3. I dig bad guys. Ruffled hair, unshaven and careless fashion have the maximum appeal in my mind. Bigger the pyscho-head, the better. Somehow I feel lot of love for people who do not find me great :P But the biggest turn on is an ambitious mind. Nothing beats a guy who wants to go out and get the damn thing he likes/wants.

4. I cannot live without my friends. Literally.What I am today is such a vivid fragment of each one of them. 

5. I smile a whole freaking lot. No matter how difficult times are, I do not fail to smile. I don't have to 'try.' I can't help it but smile most of the time. :) And I love myself for that.

6. I get attached to people very easily. So easily that I go through hell to see them go, even if it's been only ten days of knowing them. Basically I love everyone. I can't think of one person I hate. It's strange.

7. I am super-balanced and super-eccentric both. That is what makes people hate me. A part of me wants to scrape paint off walls and live alone in Norway and a part of me wants to be a CEO and have a family in NYC. Most people cannot deal with it.

8. I HATE when people sulk too much or for too long. I feel so restless when I see people who cannot control their head and heart. The thumb rule of my life has been to always be in charge of my thoughts and emotions - I get irritated when I see people who are not at least 50% as in charge of their life as I am of mine.

9. I have lost some of my most important qualities - like organizing stuff and good execution of plans. I have become a procrastinator. I have lost focus. I aspire big but somehow I don't seem to be working to make those aspirations come true.

10. I want to be *exactly* like my mom when (if) I become a mother.

11. I need to talk a lot and I am damn elaborate. Actually I know my stuff so well when I talk, that I feel the need to bring that clarity on to the other person's thought. That way I end up giving long explanations!

12. I underplay stuff - I cannot show off, I will ignore if someone embarrasses himself, and I compliment only when I whole-heartedly feel it. I am a barren sea for people fishing for compliments and I am bad at giving ego massages.

13. I am a firm believer of - "love yourself if you want to love others." I totally love myself and am so proud of what I am. I would not trade an inch of me to be something or someone else.

14. I accommodate people and can go out of my way to see things from their perspective. I do not ever raid other people's space for my comfort. I do not cascade blame and in fact make it a point to see and rectify my contribution in any situation of pain/disharmony. I am not scared of taking responsibility.

15. I am damn scared of getting a head injury. That is why I am such a careful driver and I always wear a helmet while on a 2-wheeler. Somehow I fear losing my mental stability and stuff. Broken limbs and bruises, I think are cool. :)

16. I am a good listener - I fully absorb myself in a conversation and mean it when I give suggestions and/or express myself. You will never ever have me listen 'casually.'

17. I know when things seem silly but in reality mean a lot to the other person. I am good at grasping moods, facial expressions and making people comfortable around me. I do not give jitters. :) And trust me, I know when people fake. I swear!

18. I cannot remember fiction/stories. At all. I have read so many books and seen so many movies but surprisingly, I don't remember stories beyond a few days. But yes, I remember real-life stories quite well.

19. Ok this one is a no-brainer. I read a whole freakin' lot. I can live and die in a library.

20. I don't enjoy eating much. I eat because there is no other way out. And I HATE Italian food with a vengeance. For me, Indian food is the way to be! And of, course ice-creams :) I cannot have wine to save my life and I can live on Old Monk for the next 20 years :D

21. I do not and cannot cry. Disagree as much as you like, but I really really think crying is a sign of weakness. That said, the people I love the most in the world are some of the most teary people one could ever come across. 

22. I have nothing to do with sunsigns, numerology, palmistry, tarrot, kundali etc etc. I see no point trying to predict. Anyway we do our thing, no matter what the gyaanis tell us!

23. I have lived in a hell lot of towns - from non descript villages to metros. Being a South Indian who grew up in North India, I think I have the best of both worlds. 

24. I cannot deck up and look all fabulous. I have no idea how to apply make-up and I think the only way to be with clothing is being low profile. I CANNOT wear loud clothes. 

25. I find it very difficult to look too happy or excited on my birthday. I totally enjoy this day but I am such a happy person even otherwise that I don't know how to look/feel happier on certain pre-fixed days...!

Me as a Googler.

I joined Google on this day exactly 3 years ago - Feb 20, 2006. RMZ Building at Hyderabad Hi-Tec city. The 'cool' place both fascinated and intrigued me. I was 1 among 4 other recruits. 2 of whom happen to be my closest friends today.

 

I hated Zubin and was neutral about Shaheen.

 

Zubin seemed arrogant and mean. Little did I know that Zubin would stand by me through thick and thin, literally. No one calls me Chotu with as much adoration as he does. He is the one person who will literally beat up anyone for my sake. I can (and I do) call him up at 2 in the night to save me from some real mess and know that he won't say a no. Like all other strong relationships, ours has also passed some acid tests and it is one of the most cherished friendships I have.

 

Shaheen seemed too simple for my liking - but she is the ultimate example of 'nothing is as attractive as simplicity.' Our bonding was spontaneous and deep. Long conversations at lunch and after lunch defined the 'us' that we are today. The last time we met, before I quit and she moved to Australia, was also over lunch - this time not at cafeteria but at Novotel.

 

Other than that, Google gave me my NB and a whole bunch of other people. Not to mention - a resume to be proud of, my trip to dream destination London and an awesome capacity to consume alcohol. 

The exquisite tragedy - My Best Friend's wedding.

Yes, I really never thought Poona would be about 4 busy working women who are my best friends and who would go out of their way to spend that extra hour with me and take time out for me, no matter what. Never thought Poona would be about fancy dinners and expensive clothes. Never thought Poona would also be about my best friend's wedding.

I was at Pune from 10th of Feb until the 13th. I was there for Piyu's wedding. Piyu's wedding was the most awaited event in the life of me and Shilpa (and of course in the life of Piyu and Chetan!)

We had a spinster party for Piyu. No there were no male strippers brought in with the bride in a limousine at Vegas over alcohol over flowing all over the place and with 50 of the bride's chic friends. The party had 3 people - The bride, Shilpa and me.

It had 2 phases. The first one started at about 10 AM and got over by 12 in the noon. There was some crazy clicking of pictures, checking out the bride's (much discussed) nightwear and li*ger*e (wink wink Piyu!) and of course - 'Piyu, brush kar! Mujhe bhook lagi hai!!!' The party had Poha, chai and vada-pav to eat, all consumed at the Joshi vade vale counter in BMCC lane.

Phase 2 was the night before the wedding - 3 of us pretending to be asleep in 3 beds in the same room at the venue of the wedding. Then there was some discussion about how we wish the wedding wasn't the next day and we could talk all night long without the fear of dark circles and swollen eyes for the bride.

The wedding started late the next day. It was a beautiful Maharashtrian wedding - simple and pure. There was a small girl, aged about 10 who sang Shubha Mangala Savadhan in the best way I've ever heard. The garlands were exchanged, the couple blessed and a tear rolled down Piyu's cheek - and that's when I decided I couldn't and wouldn't stay for the Bidaai (yes, the official send-off of the bride.) Yes, I was selfish. But seeing Piyu go was like giving my favouritest possession to someone - for no apparent reason.

I also felt the contrast between a guy's wedding and a girl's wedding. Cams's wedding was fun - he was bringing in someone new. But Piyu was going away. (In reality, Cams is gone to another girl whereas Piyu will be back to us right after her honeymoon!) We finished lunch and I almost instructed Chetan to love Piyu as much as we do, since anyway no one can love her more than us!

On my way back to Mayu's apartment, Poona had changed for me. It was a different world. Piyu was now married. Piyu was no more the girl with t-shirts that have wise cracks and denims folded up half way through her calf. Poona was no longer about the single Jinu and single Piyu not minding being called lesbian partners and being broke to the last penny on the 16th of the month.

Poona was now about Piyu's new home - with a husband; where all said and done I would be a guest, not a room mate.

* I know, the title sounds depressing. But that's how it is to give away your best friend or your sister to someone.